What I Dream For Us.....

A lot of the time, there's a white white room, with candles and a fireplace, and clean white sheets...but maybe that's creepy. Do I really want that kind of pristine life?... or is that just the sharpness of the contrast between dream and reality?

There's space and community.

There's me with glasses and a thoughtful expression on my face and books and wood floors again and you coming through and kissing me on the head.

There's you with an art space that's still clean, but maybe there's glitter or sequins on the floor.

There are chairs,couches and cushyness.

There's healthy food and smiles and so much laughter and sometimes rich desserts.

There's a giant tub.

There's rambling walks alone and together.

There's cuddling and smiling and space and living, and places with no dog hair and places to cuddlepuppies, and cheek kisses.

And wonder at each other's eyes and lips and eyelashes and ankles and those places that dip in interestingly.

And kisses like last night, but real.

And some kind of safe sluttiness, and sharing books, and talking about smart things, and saying smart things, and being respectful and fascinated and fascinating, and changing the world, and having visitors, and curling up in bed and watching movies, but in a way that some how involves snacks but no crumbs in the bed.

And dancing. places where i can stomp and not be heard and where the ceiling feels infinite like stars. And you can make sand castles and I can go swimming in the middle of the night.

And maybe there should be 34 bedrooms. some for puppies and some for snacks and some for sex and some for guests and some for all of those and....some just for sleeping.

And some of these things are such complicated impossible daydreams that i just don't know how we will ever survive, if they are what I want.

And sometimes i am in awe of how much of it we do have.....

And,and you just don't get any of this, do you?